The '04 Movie Hierarchy
Submitted by Cosgrove on Thu, 08/05/2004 - 12:34
Tags:
- A
- Before Sunset (2)
- Kill Bill, Vol. 2 (3)
- Sideways (4)
- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
- Dogville (3)
- Vera Drake
- A-
- Twentynine Palms (2)
- Primer (3)
- Last Life in the Universe
- Shaun of the Dead (4)
- Cowards Bend the Knee (2)
- Napoleon Dynamite (2)
- The Return
- Million Dollar Baby
- B+
- Red Lights
- Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring (2)
- A Tale of Two Sisters
- Touching the Void
- Infernal Affairs
- The Manchurian Candidate
- The Incredibles (2)
- The Blind Swordsman: Zatoichi
- Hero
- Control Room
- Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2)
- The Five Obstructions
- Raja
- Ginger Snaps 2: Unleashed
- Crimson Gold
- Spartan
- Spider-Man 2
- Closer
- The Corporation
- Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story (3)
- When Will I Be Loved
- End of the Century: The Story of the Ramones
- Collateral
- Baadasssss!
- B
- The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
- S21: The Khmer Rouge Killing Machine
- The Saddest Music in the World
- Team America: World Police
- Uncovered: The War on Iraq
- Fahrenheit 9/11
- Outfoxed: Rupert Murdoch's War on Journalism
- Suburban Nightmare
- I Heart Huckabees
- Troy
- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
- Notre Musique
- Love Object
- The Brown Bunny
- DiG!
- Maria Full of Grace
- Birth
- The Yes Men
- Farmingville
- The Twilight Samurai
- Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle (2)
- Zebraman
- The Big Bounce
- B-
- Secret Things
- You See Me Laughin'
- The Models of Pickpocket
- Mean Creek
- House of Flying Daggers
- Ali G Indahouse
- Stander
- The Aviator
- Disney's Teacher's Pet
- Dawn of the Dead
- Gozu
- I, Robot
- Little Black Book
- Torque
- Tokyo Godfathers
- Ella Enchanted
- Time of the Wolf
- C+
- She Hate Me
- Incident at Loch Ness
- Strayed
- The Ladykillers
- Seed of Chucky
- Friday Night Lights
- Goodbye Dragon Inn
- Open Water
- Blind Shaft
- King of the Ants
- Coffee and Cigarettes
- Bad Education
- Walking Tall
- Undertow
- The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
- Festival Express
- On the Run
- Osama
- C
- Secret Window
- Distant
- Ray
- A Very Long Engagement
- Bright Future
- The Dreamers
- Marathon
- White Chicks
- Garden State
- Eurotrip
- The Bourne Supremacy
- Broken Lizard’s Club Dread
- Mr. 3000
- A Dirty Shame
- Starsky and Hutch
- Mean Girls
- The Grudge
- Ju-On: The Grudge
- Hellboy
- Samaritan Girl
- Deathwatch
- The Butterfly Effect
- 50 First Dates
- The Manson Family
- Never Die Alone
- Blade: Trinity
- The Child I Never Was
- Japanese Story
- The Passion of the Christ
- The Machinist
- C-
- The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra
- National Treasure
- An Amazing Couple
- Catwoman
- The Village
- Darkness
- Saw
- The Punisher
- I'll Sleep When I'm Dead
- We Don't Live Here Anymore
- Ghost in the Shell 2: Innocence
- Lucky
- Suspect Zero
- The Forgotten
- Taking Lives
- D+
- Izo
- Shaolin Soccer
- Who Killed Bambi?
- Resident Evil: Apocalypse
- Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!
- Ocean's Twelve
- Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2
- Shark Tale
- Wicker Park
- The Girl Next Door
- Van Helsing
- D
- The Three Marias
- Shrek 2
- Catch That Kid
- The Card Player
- Free Radicals
- Art of the Devil
- Meet the Fockers
- A Day Without a Mexican
- Garfield: The Movie
- Anatomy of Hell
- D-
- Kaena: The Prophecy
- Malevolence
- The Stepford Wives
- The Hillside Strangler
- F
- George Bataille's Story of the Eye
- Exorcist: The Beginning
- Make a Wish
Author Comments:
Updated constantly, if all goes well. (A number beside a title indicates multiple viewings. Newest additions in bold.)
I'm sorry to see The Bourne Supremacy didn't work for you. I liked it quite a bit. I cross-referenced to your blog, and I can see where you're coming from, particularly in regard to the action sequences, which I know are polarizing. Me, I loved 'em. Much to my surprise too, because I usually like my action scenes smooth, clear, and with fewer edits to better showcase the (hopefully) ballet-like stunts and choreography.
So, when are you going to join Kent and I on the dark side and start using the 100 point scale?
Never! NEVER! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE, COPPERS! AAAAAAAAA....
Seriously, though, I just don't think I could do it. Converting from star ratings to letter grades was fairly easy because the translation didn't require much effort. But to shift to numbers... it's just too much for me. What, for instance, is the difference between a 69 and a 68? Why is a 56 within "recommended" territory but a 53 isn't? I really don't know how you and Kent (and MD'A, and Theo, and Heilman, and baaab, and...) do it.
It's actually quite easy, although admittedly sometimes the numbers are rather arbitrary. I use Mark Pittillo's handy-dandy, conversion guide to come up with my ratings. Kent does it another way. Not sure about the rest.
P.S.: You're already sorta, kinda doing this by rating movies preferentially within letter grades.
Grrr... who told you you could point out logical loopholes in my rating system?
Actually, converting the films I've seen recently might not be too difficult. It's the couple thousand other films that I don't really want to deal with right now.
Not sure if you caught the discussion between Scott and myself re: number grades; it's... it's in one of my lists, somewhere :-)
I can't really get my head around the Pitillo rating system, in terms of the weird break-off points, so I round everything off: 60+ is recommended, reservations about 40-59, and 39- is crap.
As for the difference between a 68 and a 69, I've been using previously graded movies as the benchmark as to what number I give -- If I say "I had about the same strength of feeling for Movie X as I did Movie Y", then it gets the same number. What I'm discovering is this means the entire list of rated movies is in flux (since my benchmarks are just as wobbly and subject to change as the new entries) and that I have a tendency (a reaction to the flux?) to use the same numbers over and over again, which feels like it's defeating the purpose.
So it's kind of funny: what seems like precision (with the exact numbers) is actually sort of like quantum physics, with uncertainty and waves turning into particles.
But then, perhaps I think abou this stuff too much...
I'm kinda bummed to see Ju-On get such a middlin' grade. I've been anticipating catching the Asian horror wave, but just watched Ringu tonight, and found it slightly underwhelming. Still good, but not the horror revelation I was hoping for. I'm sure the impact was lessened by seeing The Ring first, as it is a fairly slavish remake, but I'm going venture to say it was the more effective of the two movies (and then I'm going to duck). Scads less original, of course, but it's the one that got to me first.
Between your recent experience and mine, I'm wondering if the whole phenomenon isn't slightly overhyped? Then again, Audition left me curled in a fetal ball...
"Ju-On" would be frightening as hell if it made a lick of sense.
And I would say that the Asian horror renaissance is most definitely not overhyped -- it's just that mediocrities like "Ringu", "Ju-On" and "The Eye" seem to have gotten the most press, probably because they're the safest. When you factor in films like "Suicide Circle", "Pulse", "Uzumaki", "Bio Zombie" and (especially) "Audition", the picture becomes a little rosier.
Hey, thanks for the Asian Horror "to see" list!
Count me in as someone who's a wee bit skeptical about the Asian horror renaissance. I liked the original Ring, not strongly but definitely liked, and thought Ring 2 was interesting cuz I had no idea where it was going (apparently, neither did it). But both Cure and Pulse I found interesting but too flawed, The Eye was lame, and Audition...
Audition was a small, fragile porcelain cup of a movie that was smashed by hype. There was a quote on the poster, from Elvis Mitchell, I think, that went something like, "Scariest movie since The Vanishing!" Mr. Mitchell, I saw The Vanishing. The Vanishing made me so sick that I couldn't stay for the next movie in the double feature*. Audition, sir, is no The Vanishing.
So, yeah, I keep hoping to find "the one" in terms of Asian horror cinema, but I haven't found it yet.
*Knife in the Water, which I finally caught up with a few months ago, 13 years later. Turns out I didn't miss much.
Is The Vanishing really that good? Not that IMDb user ratings are worth all that much, but I do find it pretty rare that a sub-six movie is good (it scores a 5.9). We're talking about the 1993 one with Jeff Bridges, right?
Sorry the hype ruined Audition for you. I have felt that pain on many a film. Personally, I went into it with few expectations and it got me.
As for finding "the one", have you seen Battle Royale (I have not, and I'm not even sure if it counts as horror or not)?
We're talking about the 1993 one with Jeff Bridges, right?
Oh, hellll naw. :-) I'm talking about the original 1988 Dutch version, aka Spoorloos. Oddly, both were directed by the same guy. I never saw the American remake, but they supposedly put a smiley face on the end.
I was lucky enough to see Battle Royale at the 2001 SIFF. I don't really count it as horror (tho it is horrific), but yeah, there's a hardcore movie. And at times, very funny as well. Now there's one I'd like to see remade, big budget American style, but of course that would never happen.
Why yes, Sluizer did sell out his film for Hollywood with an absurd to-the-rescue ending, thereby wasting a fine and creepy performance by Bridges. Thanks for asking!
And I didn't mention "Battle Royale" in my Asian-horror highlights for much the same reason (it's not strictly a genre effort), but it basically sits on the precipice of horror with its legs over the edge far enough for me to let it sneak in the back of the genre. Whenever I see a movie like "Battle Royale" (or "Little Murders", or "Twentynine Palms", or...) that doesn't quite fit into traditional horror classifications, I ask myself one question: Did it freak me the hell out? If yes, then pedants be damned -- it's horror.
And, Mr. KZA... you need to take another look at "Audition". Trust me, it gets better with multiple viewings. (It's also the only film I've ever seen my mother walk out on.) You're also totally wrong about "Knife in the Water", but that's neither here nor there. :-)
I should have known! The IMBb and my own memory tricked me. First, the IMDd doesn't list the original The Vanishing from my search bookmarklet, and then I thought you were talking about Los Desaparecidos ("The Disappeared") of Argentina which brought The Official Story to mind. While a very good movie, it's not horror, so I knew I must have been missing something. Anyway, I'll have to see the Dutch version.
I did not know (or least did not remember) that the Desaparecidos inspired a movie. I did know, however, that Conor Oberst used the term for his kickass side project a couple years back. So that should count for something, no?
Waitaminute, where's number one?
Bastard, you got to see Primer. If you see any bootleg DVDs hanging around the east coast, let me know, cuz it ain't coming to New Orleans.
And, hey, is Van Helsing worth watching for a guy who lusts after Kate Beckinsale? Not me, you see, but a friend. Yeah, a friend.
Don't be too sure about Primer skipping New Orleans. There are posters up for it at my local AMC theater here in Tulsa, so the film may get a wider release than you think.
Shalom, y'all!
L. Bangs
You're in Tulsa, right? I see it listed here as coming to your town on October 22nd. Unfortunately New Orleans is nowhere to be found on the list. We have only four screens for art/foreign/indie stuff and Primer just isn't a big enough draw, I guess.
Wow. My local AMC has a terrific new guy, Troy Sageser, handling its art screens. I knew he's great, but I didn't realize he was doing quite that good of a job. I didn't think Tulsa's getting films that aren't hitting New Orleans.
Sounds like it might be DVD for you, my friend. Sorry.
Shalom, y'all!
L. Bangs
Things were much better here, movie theatre-wise, before the advent of DVD. We've lost two dozen screens in the last five years alone, including a rep house, two dollar theatres and a handful of old-school mall cinemas. I love DVD (and Netflix), but sometimes I wish it was 1990, when there was an neighborhood rep theatre three blocks away from where I now live.
here in Tulsa
Damn, I really don't read the posts very closely, do I?
Perhaps not, but your memory is more impressive than mine is. :)
Shalom, y'all!
L. Bangs
Oh my god, you watched Garfied? Talk about taking one for the team.
My grandmother bought it. It was lying around. I had spare time.
Ouch.
What's next? SuperBabies?! ;-)
You DO realize that, since I can get it from Netflix and thus technically didn't "pay" for it, I will subject myself to that. Right?
Ha, ha. Very funny...wait a minute, you're serious, aren't you?
Like a heart attack. Hey, I need something to fill out my worst-of list. And at leats it's short. And it can't possibly be any worse than the first (or "Story of the Eye", for that matter).
it can't possibly be any worse than the first...
Ha, so you think.
Speaking of wanting to see bad movies, please tell me that Suspect Zero is crap so that I do not check every day to see if its DVD release date has been announced.
Well, I am as thrilled to see Before Sunset top your list as I am discouraged to see it absent from the radar of all the critics involved with the year-end awards. Did they all just skip the film, or do they feel it too slight up against, er, Sideways?
Shalom, y'all!
L. Bangs
Yeah, this Sideways love is getting mighty boring. In a year filled with wonderful films, you'd think that critics would be able to spread the wealth a little.
Did you hear that the New York critics' vote was actually a battle against Eternal Sunshine? Evidently the anti-Sunshiners joined the largest vote other than Eternal, and it just so happened to be Sideways.
If only we could read transcripts of the vote.
Wow, that NY stuff is new to me. Very interesting...
I like Sideways, but I am surprised to see the troops rally about it. I would love for this year's golden child to be Before Sunset, but I would certainly settle for Eternal Sunshine.
As long as they let that Sun in...
Shalom, y'all!
L. Bangs
Hey, I'm all for the "Sideways" love. If it hits gold, it'll be the first time since '99 that Oscar picks a film I love.
Absolutely! But, it ain't gonna win Best Picture. I bet it'll go to Million Dollar Baby.
Sigh...
Holy crap. Million Dollar Baby might actually be good. It has a chance of ousting Sideways as the best-reviewed film of the year!
Is Make a Wish the lesbian Friday the 13th movie? If so, is it really *that* bad?
Yes it is. At least "Story of the Eye" had ambition. "Make a Wish" is not only terrible, it's one of the laziest and most pathetic excuses for a slasher movie or a lesbian movie ever created.
Ocean's Twelve is really that bad, eh? Glad I've stayed away from it so far. You liked the original, right?
I thought the first was a breezy lark and just about perfect for what it was. The sequel is just some talented people giving each other reacharounds.
First Garfield, then Catch That Freakin' Kid Already Fer Chrissakes. What next? Taxi? Fat Albert?
I was actually interested in seeing Catch That Kid, until I figured out it wasn't a feature-length version of those Apple Jacks commercials.
It was on HBO. I'd had a really shitty day and was a third of the way into a bottle of wine. Somehow, I got it in my head that maybe it won't be that bad. I wish I could stop listening to impulses like that.
And I hear that Agent Cody Banks 2: Destination London is not all it's cracked up to be. ;-)
Yes! 100 theatricals before the end of the year! And 310 total films seen! First time I've broken 100 and 300, respectively.
100 theatricals? Daaaaammmmn. Congratulatons!
Yes!! i Anchorman fan! this iste is unusually harsh on that movie, its my 14th favourite movie ever, glad you also liked it
The Big Bounce B?, you have some splaining to do.
I liked it, what can I say. I found its lazy rhythm to be fairly charming.
What about the non ending? there were way too many twists, maybe i was expecting too much from the director of Miami Blues and Grosse Point Blank.
Hey, let's not forget that "Miami" and "Blank" also had what-the-hell-it's-time-to-end-the-film wrapups. I think that, like Tarantino, Armitage isn't too interested in getting from the beginning to the end -- he's the guy pointing out all the weird crap that you can see along the way.
SpongeBob SquarePants rules !!!
I hope this piece of constructive criticism could help you
And now let's all have crab patties
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? THE COOLEST CARTOON CHARACTER ALIVE, that's who!
THE COOLEST CARTOON CHARACTER ALIVE?? Not heard Of Timmy Turner's Dad!!???
Ooh, you're right... that is pretty tough competition. Still gotta give SpongeBob the edge, though.
Why is there no love for Shark Tale, i have to say i quite enjoyed it. the "Food Chain" scene was funny. the voice acting (Not Jack black though) was great and it had great references to other movies and popular cultures. i want to see more love for Shark Tale!!
Wish I could say I enjoyed it as you did, but I found it rather painful. I'm not really a fan of the patented Dreamworks just-add-outdated-pop-culture-references attitude to kidflicks. And I didn't think the voice acting was anything special. Except for Jack Black. Him I liked. Diff'rent strokes....
yeah actually i guess Jack's voice acting was good. actually thinking about it he was the only one doing a different voice to his own..hhhmm
hi cosgrove, i just got Coffee and Cigarettes just woundering what you thought of it?
Well, here's the review I penned last October:
"Boring, slightly amusing, boring, boring, unbelieveably boring, unspeakably boring, mostly boring, amusing, quite amusing, so awesome it scrapes genius, kind of affecting but incongruous with the rest of the film."
Hope that helps.
I'm glad i'm not the only one who kinda liked Ella Enchanted, and no it wasn't just the Anne Hathaway factor.
Now playing: Jonathan Richman: Girlfriend.
For me, it actually was the Anne Hathaway factor, though not because she's a babe (that helps, but still) -- it's because her persona is such that she can support a movie like that without it seeming silly.
The giant Heidi Klum sealed the deal for me ;)
What was your problem with Bad Education?
Now playing: Fiona Apple: Waltz.